Autopsy: the Last Hours of George Best, Channel 5 - TV review: Depressing, barrel-scraping viewing

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This was up there among the most depressing forty five minutes of television I’ve ever watched. Like the previous instalments in this misjudged series re-examining celeb deaths, the premise was paper thin at best, ridiculous at worst. Surely forensic physician Dr Jason Payne-James should have better things to do than trawl over the sad, inevitable death of a life-long alcoholic? He was examining why the demon drink wasn’t mentioned on Best’s death certificate. What was mentioned, however, was a number of other ailments, all as Payne James admitted, caused by alcohol abuse. The bottom line was: If George hadn’t started the day with a liquid breakfast “the whole sequence of events we’ve heard about would have never have happened”. No mystery there.

To ramp-up drama, there were diabolical reconstructions, the worst of which was a mock-up of Best’s night of passion with Miss World. We saw an actor playing Best frolicking on a hotel room bed, in his pants surrounded by notes (he’d won twenty grand that night, apparently). It looked like a low-budget soft porn film starring Alan Partridge. Even more depressingly, the story was recounted by Best’s own son, Calum. I mean I knew he had a penchant for crap reality TV, but this was a whole other level. Best’s ex-wife, Alex, also appeared. Perhaps they thought they were honouring his memory. They weren’t.

No one in the reconstructions looked like the people they were supposed to, and frankly, aside from a horrible vomiting blood incident, the faux Best was too healthy. When we were fleetingly shown pictures of the former Manchester United footballer as he really looked during his final days– jaundiced, tubes taped to his face, dying –that was truly shocking.